We had such a wonderful vacation. Everything went so perfectly. We both skiied better than we ever have. The weather was great. We got First Class on the way back. We even got to eat at Chevy's. Why did it have to end? I kept telling Matthew....let's just not go back. What difference would it make? We could just chuck everything and live out here in the woods. A nice little cabin to be snowed in all winter.
But no. We came back to Hell.
My mother kept Bijoux for the week that we were gone. I figured a couple days of Granny-sitting would be sufficient payback for her week of Bij-sitting. So yesterday I go over to pick them up at my grandma's house. My grandmother lives on the corner of Dixie Highway and a side street. There is a dentist office across the side street from her house. Her driveway goes down a hill into her garage. Therefore, you are not allowed to park on the street between the white house across the street and the highway. I guess that makes sense. You can park in the dentist parking lot, but not on the street in front of the dentist parking lot. So anyway I go over there and notice a car parked in the street directly behind granny's driveway as I pull into the driveway. Not only was it parked there, but it was parked all crooked and halfway up on the curb. I get them in the car as my mother is bitching about her car being back in the shop (oh yeah...needs a whole new transmission. will be in there til early next week) and how tired she is of doing this. HELLO! YOU BROUGHT THIS SHIT ON YOURSELF!! So guess what I do......back right the fuck into the illegally parked car. Because of the incline of her driveway, I could not see the car in my rearview mirror. Did not damage that car, but Liberty has several scrapes and dents on her passenger side. I guess I hit the side mirror of the car.
Now....I have a very short fuse when it comes to...well....most things. I storm into the dentist office waiting room and say "Who is driving the goddamn blue Cavalier parked on the street?" This old lady just looks at me. I said "Well if it's yours I just fucking hit it." Now I know I shouldn't be such a foul mouthed bitch - but I was pissed. Old lady came out and I start ranting and raving about "Can't you read the damn sign that says NO PARKING HERE TO CURB ??? She says she is not from around here...never been here before. I said "That's no excuse for not reading the damn sign." All she did was apologize over and over while my mother was trying to get me to shut up. Now there was part of me that felt maybe I shouldn't be acting like this because technically
I hit
her. So I called the cops and he came and filled out a report. Kentucky is a "no fault" state which means that the cop cannot make the decision as to who's fault it is. Insurance adjuster has to do that. But he told me that most likely it will be hers since she was not supposed to be there. He said it's like if I got into an accident with someone who's license was suspended....even if it was totally my fault....they were not supposed to be there so it would be on them. I hope he's right. We called the insurance company and they said they won't know until they actually file a claim!! Well that sucks. She finally said she will talk to the adjuster and get his opinion before we file anything. I have a $500 deductible anyway...so it's not worth it to file a claim if it ends up being my fault. I will just pay for it. Dammit.
But wait...there's more.
So to give my mom a break I decide to let my grandma stay here until maybe Saturday. Last night was ok...mainly cuz I had to work and didn't have to deal with it. This morning I hear her calling "Carole. Carole. Carole". That irritates the piss out of me. It's usually nonsense so I was going to ignore it for awhile. 2 things made me get up.....first...I have a candy dispenser with M&M's in it. It has a metal handle and spout, so when you get candy out of it...it makes a distinctive noise. Also the toilet kept flushing. Clink...flush. Clink...flush. Clink....flush. What the hell???
I get up to discover the horror of horrors. A shit path from the bed into the bathroom and shit all over the toilet. Here comes the best part....she was picking it up with her bare hands and on the way from the bathroom to the bedroom she was stopping for M&M's! Oh. My. Fucking. God.
I am not well equipped to deal with such things. So what do I do? Basically start screaming and losing my ever-loving mind. That confuses her and she keeps asking what happened. SHUT UP!
I get her dressed and take her back to her house to get her in the bathtub. Her hair needs to be washed as well. Which I have to do. When I go into to wash her hair, she is basically sitting in a bathtub full of crap. Little bits floating around in the water. I can't fucking take this. I just can't. So I wash her hair, get her dressed and take her downstairs to eat her breakfast. Call my mother and tell her what happened. She offers to come over here and clean this up but no..I will take care of it. I will make sure it is clean. So I come home, put on my Haz-Mat gear and spray the entire bathroom down with Clorox Bleach cleaner. I'm surprised I was not overcome with fumes. But by God that bathroom is clean now. My mom gave me some industrial strength carpet cleaner, but now I am afraid that has discoloured the carpet. Great! It's only 9 months old. After I am done I discover her nightgown laying on the floor....also covered in shit. I should just throw it away. It's new though...just got it for Christmas. But damn. Disgusting.
Why did we come home? Why did we even move back here in the first place??????
